Tri-Village News, May 21, 2003 (Front page)
Mentoring Makes a Difference
Upper Arlington News, May 21, 2003 (Feature article - "Inside Upper Arlington")
photos by Kelsey Rollins
The Tri-Village Mentor League has brought children and adults together throughout this community since 1997.
The mentor league is a program affiliated with the Big Brothers-Big Sisters Association and works to establish role models for children in Upper Arlington, Grandview Heights and Marble Cliff.
Many people must come together to make a mentoring process a success, including parents, Big Brothers and Sisters, board members and the students themselves.
“Rarely do people realize the behind the scenes efforts, talent, leadership and support that go into creating a great mentoring match.” said program director Hayley Head.
The work that goes into making one match is large and involves coordination from many people.
The Board of Directors must locate funding and secure resources. Big Brothers-Big Sisters of Central Ohio must do background checks. Current participants recruit mentors, teachers recruit children and the league coordinates interviews to create the perfect match.
One thing all of the adults who are involved share is their passion for children. Each one is enthusiastic about ensuring that the youth of tomorrow is prepared for adulthood.
“The children are our only hope.” Said board president John Miller.
"What people do for the youth is very important, whether it be a Boy Scout leader, Little League coach or a mentor.”
According to Miller, the league is trying to recruit older people to mentor and bring their experience to the younger generation.
"There are older people who can really help the youth of the area,” he said.
"They have experiences to offer and are a volunteer group that has gone untapped.”
Miller said Dick Childs is a perfect example of an older adult who can be a great mentor. According to Miller, Childs and his little brother are “a match made in Heaven.”
The Mentor
When Childs turned 62 a few years ago, he decided to give something back.
He realized that he had a great life and it was time to try and create some happiness for someone else.
When he saw a newspaper article about the Tri-Village Mentor League, he decided that being a "big brother" would be a good way to give something back to society.
"The real joys in life come from involvement with other people," he said.
"I'm a believer in being involved with your fellow man."
Now it has been four years since he was matched with his "little." He has had such a great experience that he now is a recruiter for the program.
"The best way to recruit people is to tell them what's going on and how much fun we have," he said.
Childs enjoys sharing stories of what he and his little have done, such as learning how to buy a car, talking politics and visiting Prudential Securities to learn about the stock market.
Childs tries to tell prospective mentors they're "not there in the concept of a parent, but a friend."
Childs said he especially thinks that men 45-65 would be great mentors and so he tries to bring them into the program.
"These people have the time, especially after they're retired” he said. "They've usually dealt with children already and have learned what works."
Childs tried to stress the importance of role models and mentoring in the community.
"The longer I've been in this organization, the more I realize how important it is to raise children in a positive way," he said.
"Relationships are the key to everything. Anything I can do to promote that is worth my time."
Childs does acknowledge that some people don't become mentors because of the time commitment. But he said any time with his little is well worth it.
"The more you put in the more you get out," he said. "It's possible for anyone to have a rich, profound influence on a person growing up. You may never see this, but years later, when that child is an adult, that's the payoff.
"It's worth the shot. It's worth the effort."
Spreading the word
It was certainly worth the effort when Childs met Mike Dexter at a party one evening.
The two didn't know each other but were seated together. When the conversation drifted to mentoring, Childs learned that Dexter was formerly a mentor for 11 years. "Talking to Dick got me really enthusiastic about it again," said Dexter. Childs was able to persuade Dexter to become a Big Brother for a second time.
After the party, Dexter signed up to be a big brother and was paired with Pete Mossman
The two have been paired for about a year hang out together two to three times a month. Both have fun going to Columbus Crew games, Blue Jacket games, golfing, camping and sometimes just playing video games for a little while.
"With me he gets to experience things he formally wouldn't," said Dexter.
"It's good so he can see what else is out here in the world." One of Mossman's favorite outings with Dexter was when they went camping in his back yard. He said it was fun to roast marshmallows and talk to Dexter all night.
Mossman said he would recommend having a Brother to all of his friends.
"I just think it's fun," he said.
"It's different from my other friends. You can do more stuff with a friend that's older than you."
Another one of Mossman's favorite days was when he visited Dexter at his design firm and Dexter gave him some pointers how to draw.
"I like the way he draws, so he taught me," said Mossman. "He drew all kinds of monsters with big eyes or lumps on their heads."
Dexter said that he thinks Pete's having a good time, but knows how much he, too, enjoys the friendship.
"It's fun to hang out with Pete," he said. "Just knowing things Pete has said to me and that he likes talking to me. That's more important than anything we do."
The board
Neither Dick nor Mike could be such a success were it not for the hard work of Tri-Village Mentor League board member Jim Egan.
Egan, a Grandview city councilman, was never a Big Brother but has been involved in mentoring programs for a long time.
"I've been interested in helping the youth of the city for many, many years," he said. Egan was a junior achievement adviser and a Boy Scout leader, so it seemed natural when he was approached for a board position with mentorship league.
Egan has been involved in developing mentoring programs in the high schools, tries to help go out and find mentors and also works to raise funds for the program.
"We're on a continuous search for funding," he said. "We've been very lucky in getting support from the community."
Egan is also in communication with the schools to try and identify students who could benefit from a big brother or big sister.
"It does not necessarily mean the child has a problem," said Egan. "He or she may just need additional guidance or help."
Egan says a major problem for the program is that some parents see the program as a bad image of their parenting abilities.
"This has no reflection on them as a family at all," said Egan.
quot;There could be a student who's good in school and has a good relationship with his parents, but if one travels a lot, a mentor could step in to take them to a museum or ball game."
For all of the work Egan puts into fundraising and looking for bigs and littles, he said the experience is very rewarding.
"I get a sense of responsibility in finding matches and then a feeling of satisfaction when I hear back from someone like Dick Childs," he said.
"I can feel successful, but with this program I can actually see it, too."
Getting involved
Through these gentlemen, the Tri-Village Mentor League is able to be a success. From top to bottom, the league can boast of happy participants who all may have joined in different facets and for different reasons, but ultimately had one goal in mind: helping young people reach their potential.
For more information on mentoring opportunities through the Tri-Village Mentor League and Big Brothers-Big Sisters, call 470-3224, or visit www.mentorleague.com.